I just don't understand....

I just don't understand....

I do not understand how everyone under the sun can pop out children left and right. Some deservant, some not so much and others not at all. I am tired of seeing women who already have children that they struggle to take care of pregnant again. I hate seeing a man who pops out 5 children and doesn't do shit to take care of them produce more children. You have people like me who want nothing more in the world to have a child and have not had any luck what so ever. There are so many children out here who are neglected and even murdered because these parents aren't deserving. It's such a shame. All I want in life is a baby of my own that I can love and provide for, it's not the same when it is someone else's child. I guess my time will come when God feels like I am ready.

Exes

Funny thing happened yesterday, my ex who I was with since August of 2011 and we broke up on and off throughout the relationship which officially ended in December of 2012 text me. Now the entire "relationship" was a joke he used me and played with my heart while all along he had no intentions of ever being faithful, you know how I know? Well let's see, he conceived a child with some female he introduced to me as a friend in August of 2011. I had never been to his house, he had never been to mine. The relationship that we had mostly consisted of the hotel after the club closed when he came down to "work". Not much of a relationship if you ask me, I damn well deserved better. Now we ended officially in December and he got married in April to the girl he conceived this child with.... hmmm sounds fishy. But the funny thing is he text me questioning my relationship. I have not spoke to this man in 3 months, haven't been friends with him on Facebook and yet he knows everything going on in my life.... Good. Then he knows I am happier then I have ever been. I may have started dating a man who once dated this female that I knew, this girl and I were nothing more then facebook and myspace acquaintances so I could care less about her. No I was not talking to him while they were together, nor even when he was in prison. I started talking to him in December of 2012 and been going strong since then. No matter how many obstacles we have came across we have made it through which is what we will continue to do. Exes will not break us, we have something better then they ever will. His ex has tried to talk shit about me to him making me sound like a bad person and yet he is still at home with me where he belongs. She has texted my ex and told him a bunch of things that really is not his nor her concern. I wish everyone would move on with their lives and leave ours alone. If he is happy in his marriage then why text me questioning my relationship, and if she has moved on and is happy with her new man then I wish she would stop texting, calling and emailing my man. It only makes sense to be concerned with your own relationship.